grammar
An English Lover’s TreatiseIf you’re learned to speak fluent English, you must be a genius! This little treatise on the lovely language we share is only for the brave. Peruse at your leisure, English lovers.
~The bandage was wound around the wound.
~The farm was used to produce produce.
~The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
~We must polish the Polish furniture.
~He could lead if he would get the lead out.
~The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
~Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
~A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
~When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
~I did not object to the object.
~The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
~There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
~They were too close to the door to close it.
~The buck does funny things when the does are present.
~A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
~To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
~The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
~After a number of injections my jaw got number.
~Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear.
~I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
~How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
~If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd or an end?
~People, not computers, invented English, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That’s why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
~And… why doesn’t “Buick” rhyme with “quick”?
posted by Dana @ 10:02 AM
3 Comments:
hahah! english sucks man.
nothing about alias huh? guess i'm just a fob
very interesting...
I like this one too.
How can it be hot as hell one day and cold as hell on another?
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